Leadership perspective

Do You Share These Observations Regarding Leadership Momentum?

In the ever-evolving landscape of today’s leadership, it is crucial to continually reassess and adapt strategies for sustained success. As we continue to embark on another year of growth and development, it is imperative to reflect on the trajectory of our coaching practices, the relevance of our work, and our fulfillment within our professional endeavors. Let's delve into the currents of leadership momentum and explore actionable insights to navigate these dynamic waters.

As we go through a journey of introspection and planning for the future, it is essential to contemplate the evolution of our coaching practices. Amidst the influx of new clients, questions about the shape and direction of our practice arise. How many new clients will we engage with during the rest of the year? What transformations await both ourselves and our clients? By meticulously examining these inquiries, we pave the way for proactive planning and a mutually fulfilling year.

Moreover, a critical aspect of our professional growth lies in evaluating the relevance of our work with clients. Reflecting on past engagements offers invaluable insights into the effectiveness and significance of our contributions. Are the services we provide still relevant in today's rapidly evolving landscape? Are they meeting the evolving needs of our clients as they navigate their complex organizational challenges?

Momentum

Drawing inspiration from the concept of momentum in personal finance, we can apply a similar principle to assess our professional relevance. Just as our past performance informs future investment decisions, our past endeavors shed light on the trajectory of our impact and effectiveness. By conducting a thorough momentum analysis of our experiences, we can gain clarity on areas of strength and opportunities for growth.

Here are four key observations gleaned from this reflective process:

1. Cultivating Emotional Intelligence: In a world driven by cognitive prowess, emotional intelligence emerges as a cornerstone of effective leadership. These insights resonate deeply, emphasizing the pivotal role of emotional skills in fostering success, character, and meaningful relationships within organizations.

2. Fostering Relational Empathy: Amidst societal polarization, the art of empathetic understanding becomes increasingly scarce. As leaders, transcending our perspectives and embracing empathetic engagement fosters cohesion and collaboration amidst diverse viewpoints.

3. Embracing Flexibility in Ambiguity: In times of upheaval and uncertainty, the ability to adapt and thrive in ambiguity emerges as a defining trait of resilient leadership. Embracing a "new normal" requires a shift towards emotional flexibility and a proactive approach to navigating turbulent waters.

4. Nurturing Talent Connections: Despite economic fluctuations, investing in talent remains paramount for organizational success. Proactive engagement with talent fosters loyalty, innovation, and a robust foundation for future endeavors.

These observations serve as catalysts for meaningful dialogue and introspection.

Do you resonate with these insights, or do you have unique observations to share from your organizational context?

Let's embark on a journey of exploration and collective learning as we navigate the currents of leadership momentum together!

Evaluating Leadership Momentum: Reflections, Trends, and Future Pathways

The holiday period between mid-December and mid-January often sees a lull in new coaching or training engagements. It’s a period I've come to utilize for reflection and planning, a time to ponder on the trajectory of my coaching practice for the upcoming year while working with existing clients and welcoming new ones.

As I stand on the threshold of a new year, pivotal questions arise: How many new clients will I engage with? Who will they be? What shape will my coaching practice take in the months ahead? Contemplating these queries is vital for proactive planning, ensuring a successful journey both for me and my clients.

Beyond client engagements, I dedicate time to scrutinizing the nature of the work I’ve undertaken in the past year. Examining my calendar reveals numerous instances of teaching, training, facilitating, coaching, and content creation. Yet, I confront a challenging query: Is this work still relevant? Is it impactful for those who seek my guidance in fostering leadership within their organizations?

Personal reflection becomes paramount. Analyzing how I allocate my time and comparing it with what truly brings me fulfillment in my professional life is integral. In this pursuit, I borrow from the concept of momentum—an idea not only confined to finance but also applicable to assessing relevance in various domains.

My reflective journaling has led to several observations:

Drawing from a financial newsletter I follow, momentum signifies the tendency for recent performance to persist shortly. Analogous to objects in motion staying in motion, it represents an objective measure for strategizing based on real data rather than impulsive decision-making prompted by fleeting external influences.

Emotional Intelligence Endures: The significance of emotional intelligence remains pivotal in leadership development. Dan Goleman aptly encapsulates this by emphasizing EQ over purely cognitive abilities. Organizations often overlook this crucial aspect while emphasizing skill sets and intelligence.

  1. Relational Empathy Deficit: In our polarized world, understanding diverse perspectives seems to have taken a back seat. Leaders are increasingly entrenched in their viewpoints, neglecting the skill of empathizing and comprehending others' perspectives, causing a rift in ineffective leadership.

  2. Adapting to Ambiguity: Turbulent times necessitate flexibility. Leaders are confronted with ambiguity and change, requiring emotional adaptability and support for their teams amid uncertainty.

  3. Nurturing Talent Connections: The current robust job market underscores the importance for senior leaders to actively engage with and nurture talent within their organizations. This involves more than just assessing returns on investments; it's about fostering connections and understanding the aspirations of the workforce.

I invite you to share your thoughts on these observations or contribute your unique insights about your organization. Let's connect and delve into these observations or explore your perspectives as we embark on the possibilities for next year.

Warm regards,

Scott

Having the Courage to Speak Truth to Power in Leadership

in the realm of leadership, a crucial yet daunting task is the ability to communicate truths that challenge the status quo. Henry Kissinger once remarked on the challenge young leaders face when delivering uncomfortable truths to those in positions of authority. This act of 'speaking truth to power' involves presenting contrary information up the hierarchical ladder, often met with potential repercussions that can range from rejection and dismissal to humiliation and isolation.

The weight of this challenge is considerable. Young leaders often find themselves at a crossroads, withholding essential information due to the fear of negative outcomes. However, there exists a significant upside to sharing concealed insights with a leader:

  • Recognition for valuable input

  • Inclusion in decision-making processes

  • Appreciation for displaying courage

  • Acknowledgment of one's contribution

Despite the inherent risk and tension in 'speaking truth to power,' it remains an essential responsibility, influenced by various factors:

  • Organizational culture and its tolerance for information sharing

  • Personal risk tolerance of young leaders

  • The leader's historical response to different opinions

Receptivity of the Leader

The burden of initiating these difficult conversations can be likened to wearing a shirt made of lead. However, the duty lies not solely on the deliverer but also on the receiver—particularly senior leaders—to create an environment conducive to open communication. The senior leadership's ability to foster an atmosphere where individuals feel empowered to share crucial information plays a pivotal role.

In a fast-paced organizational landscape driven by a 'get-it-done-now' culture, the pressure to survive often eclipses the necessity to foster an environment of open dialogue and shared truths. As leaders, it becomes imperative to cultivate a culture and persona that welcomes diverse voices and viewpoints.

5 Actionable steps

Here are five actionable steps for leaders seeking to gather comprehensive information crucial for making well-informed decisions:

  • Slow down your cadence: Rushing through decisions often leads to tunnel vision. Take deliberate pauses, allowing yourself to explore multiple possibilities.

  • Cultivate curiosity: Suspend the need to assert your perspective immediately. Instead, invest effort in understanding others' viewpoints before forming conclusions.

  • Express gratitude: Acknowledge and appreciate inputs, even if they challenge your assumptions. Simple acts of gratitude foster a more inclusive and respectful environment.

  • Reflect: Engage in introspection at the end of each day. Analyze interactions objectively, focusing on understanding motives and responses without defensiveness.

  • Develop your leadership soul: While intelligence and skills are crucial, investing in the inner growth of your leadership persona is equally vital. Explore avenues to nurture and develop your leadership essence.

In navigating the complexities of leadership, embracing the courage to voice uncomfortable truths while fostering an environment that is valuable to such conversations is pivotal. It's in this synergy of openness, reflection, and proactive development that leaders can truly cultivate an atmosphere where every voice is valued and heard.

Homework:

Select one action from the previously mentioned list and practice it consistently for a week. For instance, consciously express gratitude in every interaction or communication you have. Reflect on how this practice impacts your leadership approach, and share your experiences here.

Do You Share These Observations Regarding Leadership Momentum?

I am regularly adding new coaching clients into my practice throughout the year. With that in mind, an important area to reflect on is the future of my coaching practice. “How many new clients will I engage with next year? Who will they be? What will my coaching practice look like in the coming months?” It is important to thoughtfully reflect on these questions in order to determine how I can proactively plan for a successful year for both myself and my clients.

Another area of my professional life that I reflect on is the work my clients have asked me to do with them. I begin by looking at my calendar to observe all the work I did in the past 12 months. I look at all the times I spent teaching, training, facilitating, coaching, creating content, etc. Then, I ask myself a hard question: “Is the work I am doing still relevant? Is it meaningful for those who call on me to work with leaders in their organization?”

Finally, I spend time in personal reflection and journaling. Perhaps most importantly, reflecting on how I spend my time, then I compare this data with what I really enjoy doing in my work life.

Momentum

One way to look at whether or not I am relevant is by using the idea of momentum. This is a concept that I borrow from the world of personal investing and finance.

One of the personal-finance newsletters I read on a very regular basis is called “Sound Mind Investing. (You can learn more about them at www.soundmindinvesting.com.)

In an older newsletter, Matt Bell wrote about the concept of momentum. According to Matt:

“A fundamental mistake many investors make is to move too quickly in choosing investments. They read about a hot stock or this year’s best-performing mutual fund and jump in. It’s all very ad hoc and reactive. Momentum is the idea that the recent past performance tends to persist-that is, it tends to continue, at least into the near term future.”

This means that what has happened in the recent past is likely to continue into the near future. It is what we know to be true from the world of physics; that an object in motion tends to stay in motion, while an object at rest stays at rest.

Momentum in the financial world becomes an objective measure of what is going on in the marketplace so that the investor can build a strategy based on real data and not just turn on the TV and be moved to buy random stocks.

Momentum Analysis

As I analyzed my journaling from the past years, here are 4 things I noticed:

  1. Emotional Intelligence remains an important leadership construct.

    This is true for both the training work I do as well as the coaching. Most of the time when leaders hire me there is some growth desired in this area. I think Dan Goleman got it right when he wrote, “What really matters for success, character, happiness, and lifelong achievements is a definite set of emotional skills, not just purely cognitive abilities.” Organizations put so much emphasis on how smart and skillful people are that they often miss this other very important dynamic of “how” they work with others.

  2. Relational empathy.

    I don’t know if this is a symptom of our political climate or not, but people have become very polar. They have an idea or a framework for how the world should be and they stick to it no matter how silly it makes them look. Maybe this is a natural outcome of divisions of labor, where those trained in finance wear finance glasses and only see the world through finance. Or, how those who are trained and educated in marketing only see the world through a marketing lens.  As leaders, we seem to have lost the skill of trying to understand where the other person is coming from, and, even more important, what it is like to be them. We are so concerned with our own selfish ambition and desires that we have lost sight of the perspective of other ways of seeing and doing.

  3. Being flexible in ambiguous times.

    I was on a call with a potential client once whose organization has been turned upside down. Half of the people have either been laid off or reassigned to new roles. There is a tremendous amount of ambiguity about what certain jobs actually are and what people are supposed to do every day. I was asked to talk with the team about the impact of emotions during times of tension and what to watch for as leaders when working with others. I was interrupted with a question in the middle of my presentation when one well-meaning soul asked, “Dr. Livingston, enough already about helping people process the loss they have experienced, can you just help us get to a place where things are normal and we can all just get back to work?” My response to them was? “This is your new normal. Learning to be emotionally flexible and helping people deal with where they are in the moment IS the new calling for leaders.”

  4. Connecting with talent.

    When the stock market slides, notwithstanding the economic outlook and, more specifically, the jobs outlook, is really robust. Senior leaders need to make sure they are connecting with talent because my sense is that talent is always itching for new opportunities. I think senior leaders need to get much better at proactively scheduling time to connect and care about the talent in the organization. Take them for coffee. Schedule a lunch. Learn what is on their mind. You do not need to do another ROI calculation on a process. What you really need to do is ensure you have the talent on your team to turn the future you are planning for into a reality.

Do you agree with these 4 observations? Let’s discuss these observations, or you can share your unique observations regarding your own organization.

Are You Listening to This Voice in Your Leadership?

Every leader needs a voice that will speak truth to others and help them see things that are not obvious. Henry Kissinger is famous for saying that one of the most difficult things for a young leader to do is to “speak truth to power;' to go up the power gradient with information that is contrary to what the hierarchical, authoritative, and referent, position believes to be true. We have all been there at points and felt the emotion of that moment. There is inherent organizational danger in communicating things to a leader that they are not seeing at the moment:

  • You could be rejected, which leads to embarrassment

  • You could be dismissed, which leads to self-doubt

  • You could be humiliated, which leads to isolation

  • You could be discounted, which leads to demoralization

The young leader has information that someone in a decision-making position needs to hear, and is frozen at the moment by these potentially negative outcomes.

The other side of the proposition is, all things being equal, there is a huge upside in communicating to a leader what they are not seeing at the moment:

  • You could be celebrated for the input

  • You could be included in the decision-making process

  • You could be honored for your courage

  • You could be valued for your contribution

Whether it is a part of reality or a figment of our imagination as leaders, “speaking truth to power” can seem overwhelming. This is the risk tension that young leaders face. Some of the mediators that go into the “speak truth to power" equation are:

  • The culture of the organization-What is the level of freedom that truly exists for information sharing?

  • Young leaders' personal-risk tolerance-Where do they fall on a spectrum between “wary” and “adventurous”?

  • Receptivity of the leader to feedback-What is the historical behavior elicited when contrary opinions have been shared?

Receptivity of the Leader

I think we can all agree that the young leader when faced with a decision to speak truth to power, has a burden that can feel like wearing a shirt made of lead.

However, as more senior leaders in organizations, how much of the burden falls on us to create an atmosphere where much of the risk is mediated for a young leader? How much of the responsibility is ours to create an environment in which others feel the freedom to be able to share?

I argue that much of the speaking-truth-to-power-dichotomy rests not in the hands of the deliverer but the receiver. And yet the senior leader is the one who oftentimes has the most to lose by missing key information that was never brought to them. In the fast-paced, get-it-done-now, microwave culture that organizations exist in today, many of us cave into our survival reptilian brain that tells us to do whatever we can to survive.

Many times these environmental and personal factors are not acting in our favor. As leaders, we have to put effort into creating a persona and a culture so that the voice we need to be able to hear in our organization comes through.

5 Actions you can work on today

Here are my top 5 tips for leaders who want to improve their chances of gathering all of the information they need to hear to be able to make an informed decision:

  • Slow down your cadence-Most of the leadership mistakes I have made were because my world was moving too fast and I did not slow down to see more possibilities. The faster I went, the more convinced I became that I was right, and the further away I got from the truth. Take a deep breath, count to 10, silently sing a familiar tune very slowly (I like; “Row, row, row, your boat”), pray, and do whatever you need to do to slow your reality down.

  • Become curious-The practice is to suspend your need to be right or heard and to work really hard to understand the other person's position. Before you jump to conclusions or shoot them down because of what you know that they don’t, spend some time to really discern the message they are bringing to you.

  • Always say thank you-You would be surprised at how often I observe leaders in interactions where they turn and walk away without expressing gratitude. I don’t think it is an intent to be mean or degrading, the pressure of the moment takes the brain to the next thing rather than finishing the relationship with the current interaction. Researchers at USC found that simple acts of gratitude provide benefits ranging from feelings of reward and satisfaction to just helping people to hold on to their humanity.

  • Spend time reflecting- At the end of your day, take the time to review the day. Review interactions you had with others. Resist the temptation to become defensive and ask yourself questions like: “I wonder what they were really trying to ask me? Why did I feel such a strong need to defend myself? Why did I feel such a strong need to exert power at the moment? What unintended consequences could the action I took cause?

  • Do the inner work of developing your soul- The psychology data says you are as intelligent right now as you will ever be. Your personality is fully formed, so you know if you are extroverted or introverted. You have most of the skills you will ever need. So what is your next step in development? Do you need to work on developing the soul of your leadership?

Homework:

Pick one of the 5 Actions above and work on it every day for a week. For example, in every personal interaction and in every email you send, say “thank you." Work on making your attitude heartfelt. If you try any of these let me know how they go for you.

How Not to RIDE the Negative Train

Duke Ellington once said, “A problem is a chance for you to do your best.” I just love this perspective. I wonder how many of us really see it this way?  I wonder how many of us as leaders, when people on our teams bring us situations that feel like a problem, see it as an opportunity to do our best?

Reflect with me for a moment. Stop, take a sip of your coffee, and think back over your last week. What is a situation or a problem that someone on your team brought you? Do you feel as a leader that your perspective was a chance for you to do your best? Do you feel you took the opportunity to help the person bringing you the problem to do their best?

Perspective

One of the more interesting things about being an executive coach is that I get an opportunity to have a lot of interactions with a lot of different leaders. I have been known to log over 42 hours of Zoom meetings sometimes in a couple of weeks! For me, and I am sure you as well, this has been a pretty typical pace since the pandemic started. 

For the past couple of years, I have been paying closer attention to not only what people are showing up with, but how they show up. In leadership coaching, I get the chance to help folks look at their leadership and ensure how they show up is how they intend to keep showing up.

Most of us want to make sure our intentions match our impact. It is my experience, however, that not many of us stop and think proactively about what we want our impact to be. Especially when there is a problem and that problem has an emotion attached to it.

Go back to the reflection you did at the beginning of this post. As a leader, when the person on your team brought you the problem, did how you want to show up match how you did show up? Or, were you so caught up in the emotion of the problem that you had a hard time even knowing what problem it was you were trying to solve? I see this a lot! I will often ask folks I am working with...”Now, what problem is it we are solving exactly? Let's keep the main thing.”

Example

Some of you know that I am an avid golfer. Not a good golfer, but I really enjoy the challenge the game brings to me. So many little things have to be done right to hit a good golf shot, and once in a while, I hit a good one even though I don’t do everything right.  Those are the ones that keep me coming back.

So for Valentine’s Day one year, my wife gave me a great gift. It was a golf fitting for new clubs. It was a really great experience for me and I was like a kid in a candy store. I was so excited! This was something I had always wanted to do.  

When the day came for me to go to the fitting, I walked in at 3:30 pm for my appointment and I was met by this really high-energy guy named James. He could tell I had one eye on the bay where you get to try out the new clubs. But before he would let me take a swing, he asked me a question, “Why are you here?” My response was not well thought out, nor very accurate it turns out.  

I told James “I have always wanted to do this and I am really excited,” I quipped, just wanting to get into that bay and hit a ball with the newest technology golf club makers have to offer.

“Awesome!” James responded, with so much enthusiasm that it was effervescent coming out of him.

But, then he changed his tone, took his enthusiasm down about 3 notches, and said, “I appreciate your excitement, but why are you here? What is it that you are trying to achieve through this experience in your golf game?” 

Dang! I had been so excited about the opportunity, I completely lost focus on the problem I was trying to solve. 

“I want to hit the ball straighter and further,” I said in response. 

“Good,” he said. “I can help you do that, but I don’t think that is why you are here.”

Now I was a bit stunned, perplexed, and feeling a little like I was about to enter a therapy session. 

“I give,” I said…”Why am I here?”

“Exactly,” James said again…” Why are you here?” He didn’t answer my question for me but was going to make me answer. It was like therapy!!

Then, a light went off for me about skill. “I want to be a better golfer. No, wait, I want to lower my golf score. and I want to be more competitive on the golf course.”

“Yes!” James yelled. Literally yelled. I mean he screamed it so loud I think people having dinner at Chick-fil-A across the street could have heard him.

“Let's work to solve that problem,” James said when he calmed down. And when we got in the simulator and I would hit a ball 30 yards further with a new club, he would say, “Now that shot will lower your score on the course!” 

Being Coached

James either had a natural ability or someone had trained him on some excellent coaching techniques. As I reflected on that experience, James was actually pulling from some great psychology as he was preparing me to buy golf clubs. (Hey, James had a goal, too. Make no mistake, he gets paid to sell golf clubs, and I love the set he sold me!)

RIDE*

Here is a model I use in coaching when problems that have negative emotions are brought to the discussion.  I try to find a way for the person NOT to “RIDE” the negative train. I use the acronym RIDE as a process. Each element is really an independent tool, so you do not have to use them all or think of them in a stepwise fashion.

The problem I had in my golf fitting example was that I had lost my perspective on why I was there. Here is what James helped me with, even if he didn’t know the psychology behind it.

R: Remove the negative thing. This strategy employs taking the thing that is negatively impacting me out of the situation. My excitement was clouding my perspective to see why I was really there.

I: Insert a more positive perspective. This can involve distracting my attention away from the issue causing negative emotions. He took my emotion that to me felt positive - but it actually was negative because it was in my way of seeing the problem and got me to the root of why I was there in the first place.

D: Distract the attention from the negative thing. Finding something less negative can put the problem in perspective. James had me sit down, then offered me a Powerade as he was asking me about my expectations. He was distracting me away from my excitement so I could focus.

E: Emotionally Pivot. Help the person change the emotion to match the problem. James brought me down so skillfully off my high, never losing his enthusiasm, but helped me focus so that when I got in the bay I was calmer and he could do his job. Nice work, James.

How about you as a leader? If you go back to your reflection exercise at the beginning of this post, could you insert one of the elements of the RIDE model to help someone on your team?


*For all you academics out there, the RIDE model was derived from research done by Little, Gooty, and Williams and published in Leadership Quarterly 2016. The article is titled: The role of leader emotion management in leader-member exchange and follower outcomes.

5 Ways to Work With a Difficult Boss

I got a call last week from an old friend. After we exchanged some pleasantries about our families, the reason for his call came quickly.

“Hey Scott, I have been reading your leadership blog for several years now and I was wondering if I could ask you a question. We just did a reorganization at work and I got a new boss. I connected well with my previous supervisor but this new one is off to a rocky start. Wondering if you have any tips?”

After asking if my friend had experienced rough starts with other supervisors in the past, and getting a “not really” response, I started thinking about how it feels to work with difficult people.  

The first thing that clients I have had in the past want me to focus on is changing the other person, in this case, my old friend’s boss. Since I am not working with the old friend’s new boss, the odds of me invoking any kind of advice to change that person is slim to none. 

What we can work on, however, is how my old friend is responding to his new boss. Here are the things we talked about that day:

5 Ways to Work With a Difficult Boss

  1. Maintain Long-term Focus: It is so easy for us to get caught up in the emotion of the moment. All of the frustration and anxiety that can come from a new relationship can seem paralyzing. Keep in mind that the supervisor you had prior to this one took time for the relationship to develop. Even if it started off on a good foot, relationships take time to evolve. So if this relationship gets off to a rocky start make sure to keep a long-term perspective. When I asked how long my friend had worked for the previous manager he said about 2 years, which is about how long he has worked for anyone over the last 20 years at the company. Supervisors tend to be temporary, and very few work relationships last forever. 

  2. Find and Convey the Good: When we have irregular people in our lives (those that are hard for us to connect with), it is really easy for us to focus on all the negative things. Focusing on the negative does one thing, it forces us to only look at all the bad. A simple recognition of what is not going so well is ok and something to process with a coach or trusted advisor. But dwelling on what is negative is not helpful in the long run. So make a list of all the positive things the new boss is bringing to the table and do the best you can to focus on those. 

  3. Have a Spirit of Acceptance. There are many reasons that a relationship with a boss might get off to a rocky start. Very rarely, the reason is that the boss is innately evil. While I always want to give space in a relationship for moral hazard, most of the time the new boss just wants to win, maybe they have been told to shake things up, or they have strong preferences based on their past experiences. Whatever the reason is for how the new boss is behaving, as long as it is not immoral or illegal, you can try to approach them with a spirit of accepting them for who they are…warts and all. I try to keep in mind that the new boss is checking me out as well and I might have a few warts myself.  Sometimes all a boss needs from us is to connect with them without judgment.

  4. Set some clear boundaries for yourself. It is very true that you might not be able to control or change the other person but you can always control your own actions. According to John Townsend in his book The Hiding Dilemma, “People with healthy boundaries can say yes to the good and no to the bad.” The person who is saying yes to someone else’s demands out of fear is setting themselves up for failure. Plan what you can say yes to and what crosses the line in your mind that you must say no.  Resist the temptation to just say yes to try and please them or get on their good side. As you plan your boundaries, keep in mind what you are willing to do in certain situations and what you are not willing to do.

  5. Stay Open and Curious. If a relationship is tense from the start, our natural inclination is to protect ourselves and fight. None of us wants to get hurt in a relationship or get sideways with a boss especially if we really enjoy our work. According to Edgar Schein, if you practice “Humble Inquiry” you will stimulate more truth-telling and collaboration.  By staying humble in your own character and curious about what might be going on you can stay out of judgment and see more clearly what the boss is all about.

Your Development

From time to time we are all going to work with people, who are for whatever reason, tough for us to process. Here is a case study for you to write about yourself to help you see how you might strive to improve the relationship. Remember you are the one sensing the tension. You are the one who may have to flex and find a new approach.

  • Think about a conversation or situation with a boss that went very well.

  • Now think about a situation or conversation with a boss that did not go well.

  • Compare your Thinking, Feelings, and Behavior in each circumstance. Use the chart below to guide your thoughts:

As you study the chart above, what are you learning about yourself and your approach to working with people who are more difficult for you to relate to?

Do You Share These Observations Regarding Leadership Momentum?

There are not many folks from about mid-December through mid-January who are wanting to engage in new coaching or training opportunities, so each year I use those weeks for reflection and planning. 

In addition to the clients I am currently working with, I am regularly adding new coaching clients into my practice throughout the year. With that in mind, an important area to reflect on as one year ends and a new one begins is the future of my coaching practice. How many new clients will I engage with this year? Who will they be? What will my coaching practice look like in the coming months? It is important to thoughtfully reflect on these questions in order to determine how I can proactively plan for a successful year for both myself and my clients.

Another area of my professional life that I reflect on is the work my clients have asked me to do with them. I begin by looking at my calendar to observe all the work I did in the past 12 months. I look at all the times I spent teaching, training, facilitating, coaching, creating content, etc. Then, I ask myself a really hard question: Is the work I am doing still relevant? Is it meaningful for those who call on me to work with leaders in their organization?

Finally, I spend time in personal reflection and journaling. Perhaps most importantly, reflecting on how I spend my time, then comparing this data with what I really enjoy doing in my work life.

Momentum

One way to look at whether or not I am relevant is by using the idea of momentum. This is a concept that I borrow from the world of personal investing and finance.

One of the personal-finance newsletters I read on a very regular basis is called Sound Mind Investing. (You can learn more about them at www.soundmindinvesting.com.)

In the January 2019 newsletter, Matt Bell wrote about the concept of momentum. According to Matt:

“A fundamental mistake many investors make is to move too quickly in choosing investments. They read about a hot stock or this year’s best-performing mutual fund and jump in. It’s all very ad hoc and reactive.”

Matt goes on to write that:

“Momentum is the idea that the recent past performance tends to persist-that is, it tends to continue, at least into the near term future.”

This means that what has happened in the recent past is likely to continue into the near future. It is what we know to be true from the world of physics; that an object in motion tends to stay in motion, while an object at rest stays at rest.

Momentum in the financial world becomes an objective measure of what is going on in the marketplace so that the investor can build a strategy based on real data and not just turn on the TV and be moved to buy a stock by some talking head at the moment.

Momentum Analysis

As I analyzed my journaling from the past years, here are 4 things I noticed:

  1. Emotional Intelligence remains an important leadership construct. This is true for both the training work I do as well as the coaching. Most of the time when leaders hire me there is some growth desired in this area. I think Dan Goleman got it right when he wrote, “What really matters for success, character, happiness, and life long achievements is a definite set of emotional skills - your EQ - not just purely cognitive abilities…” Organizations put so much emphasis on how smart and skillful people are that they often miss this other very important dynamic of the “how” they work with others.

  2. Relational empathy. I don’t know if this is a symptom of our political climate or not, but people have become so polar. They have an idea or a framework for how the world should be and they stick to it no matter how silly it makes them look. Maybe this is a natural outcome of divisions of labor, where those trained in finance wear finance glasses and only see the world through finance. Or, how those who are trained and educated in marketing only see the world through a marketing lens.  As leaders we seem to have lost the skill of trying to understand where the other person is coming from, and, even more important, what it is like to be them. We are so concerned with our own selfish ambition and desires that we have lost sight of the perspective of other ways of seeing and doing.

  3. Being flexible in ambiguous times. I was on a call with a potential client toward the end of the year whose organization has been turned upside down. Half of the people have either been laid off or reassigned new roles. There is a tremendous amount of ambiguity about what certain jobs actually are and what people are supposed to do everyday. I was asked to talk with the team about the impact of emotions during times of tension and what to watch for as leaders when working with others. I was interrupted with a question in the middle of my presentation when one well meaning soul said, “Dr. Livingston, enough already about helping people process the loss they have experienced, can you just help us get to a place where things are normal and we can all just get back to work?” My response? “This is your new normal. Learning to be emotionally flexible and helping people deal with where they are in the moment is a new calling for leaders.”

  4. Connecting with talent. The December stock market slide, not withstanding the economic outlook and, more specifically, the jobs outlook, is really robust. Senior leaders need to make sure they are connecting with talent, because my sense is that talent is itching for new opportunities. I think senior leaders need to get much better at proactively scheduling time to connect and care about the talent in the organization. Take them for coffee. Schedule a lunch. Learn what is on their mind. You do not need to do another ROI calculation on some process. What you really need to do is ensure you have the talent on your team to turn the future you are planning for into a reality.

How about you? Do you agree with these 4 observations? Leave a comment or send an email. I would love to connect with you to talk about these observations, or your unique observations regarding your organization.

Best hopes for the coming year,

Scott

Solve this Riddle and Challenge Your Leadership Perspective

Alert! There is a free gift offer at the end of this post, but you have to read the entire post to get the free gift. Not really. You could go to the end and get the offer code, CLICK HERE and just get your free gift. But then you would miss a really cool riddle and some salient leadership stuff that might help you be more productive. 

Here is the riddle:

Three travelers were on a journey when they checked into a cut-rate hotel. The clerk at the desk told them there was only one room left and the price was $30 for the night.  Exhausted, the travelers took the room and each gave the clerk a $10 bill.  The next morning the hotel manager was reviewing the guest list and noticed that the night clerk had actually overcharged the travelers for the room. The published room rate was $25, and having just been to a leadership workshop on Building Character In Leaders, he asked the Bellhop to get five $1 bills out of the drawer and to refund the travelers the $5 difference. On the way to the travelers' room, the Bellhop realized that five is not easily divisible by three and not having been to the Building Character in Leaders workshop decided to give each of the travelers $1 and stick the remaining $2 in his pocket.

Now, you realize that $9 times three travelers is $27 plus the two dollars that the Bellhop put in his pocket equals $29.

Question: Where did the other dollar go?

Reflection is such an important part of leadership.

As organizational leaders, we find ourselves in the midst of some pretty busy times these days.  "Crazy busy” is actually what Dan called it in a workshop I led yesterday. The end of the year finds us trying to cram a lot of activity into not-so-much space. On the personal side, there are holiday parties, kids' school programs, last minute travel preparations, and gift purchase fill our minds. On the business side, there are year-end performance reviews to complete, development planning discussions to have, and planning meetings to hit the ground running in January.

 It just feels like there is not enough time to get everything in, let alone find space for personal reflection.

In fact, many of you might say, “Come on, man, there is no way I have time to rest and reflect!  I’ll do that down the road...”

And then you realize you won’t. 

Because January will be just as crazy as December and February just like the two months that preceded it.

So What Is A Leader to Do?

This is a question I get asked a lot in my executive coaching practice.  “I have so much that I need to do, I don’t have time to do anything else.” and then the question comes…”So, Scott what should I do about this?”  And you can see the trap we fall into.  We think that doing something is going to get us out of the crazy.  

Now I am not going to discount things like better planning, and prioritizing important over urgent work.  There are some productivity hacks that might help some folks.  But most of the leaders I work with are “hacked out” of productivity. Everything they are working on is important. So now what.

Here is my advice:  Work less and think more.

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I recently ran across a two-year study out of Sweden that experimented with a 6 hour work day instead of a traditional 8 hour day for nurses at a care facility in Gothenburg. Here are some of the researchers' conclusions regarding the nurses who worked fewer hours:

  • They were less tired

  • less sick

  • had more energy coming home

  • increased time to do activities

  • got an average of 7 hours of sleep a day versus less than 6 hours a day for nurses working traditional hours.

  • even their blood pressure was lower than the average for all professional women in Sweeden.

So maybe you can’t get your supervisor to agree to a 6 hour work week. I get it. 

The question becomes, what can you do?

Try This Simple Step

The assumptions you are using to create your reality can’t all be valid if you can’t get everything done in the allotted time. You are telling yourself that all this craziness is normal and this is the cycle of thinking you need to break. 

But you don’t even have time to think about how to change. You are right! You don’t have the time!

You have to make the time! And I am going to give you a free gift that you can use when you make the time.

More on that in just a minute, but first the answer to the riddle: 

Answer to The Refunding The Travelers Riddle

Have you figured it out? 

If you follow the math as I originally laid it out there is a $1 that seems to be missing.

But that is because I gave you a faulty assumption.  

Each of the travelers indeed would get a $1 refund and the Bellhop put the $2 in his pocket. 

You do not add the $2 from the bellman, you subtract it from the total.  So 9 times $3 refunded reduces the price of the room to $27 dollars and when you subtract the $2 the bellman kept you get the $25 price of the room.

Faulty assumptions are at the root of many leadership issues.

What Faulty Assumptions Are You Making?

I wish I had some pixy dust or a magic wand to help you answer the above question. I don’t

But what I do have is a free gift that might be of value.

I have written The Minimalist Guide to a 4-Hour Personal Leadership Retreat and it is yours absolutely free if you CLICK HERE and enter this promo code below when you checkout:

MerryChristmas

It is my gift to you. While I don’t have the answer to what leadership assumptions you are making that are not serving you well right now, you do. You just have not MADE the time to think about what they are.

The Minimalist Guide was developed so that when you MAKE time for yourself to reflect on your personal leadership, you will have some structure to help you along the way.

If you decide to take the challenge and make some time for yourself and use the guide, drop me a note and let me know what you learned. I love hearing from you. I promise if you send me a note, I will read it and reply to it personally.